I feel very similarly. My partner ghosted me also about 3 weeks ago and after 3 years of being together/only a few days before we were supposed to close on our new home. He said he was going somewhere for the night and would talk to me in the morning but instead he drove cross country to his parents and blocked me as soon as he left, just disappearing. after 1 1/2 weeks I tried to reach out via email to apologize for my part in our fights that led up to the breakup and he didn't respond. Just blocked me on there too. I know he's back on dating apps and talking to another woman already (I saw on our phone records which are still shared) a part of me knows he loves me and his avoidant self is doing all this to distract himself from his feelings and avoid any confrontation and pain but it's also so cruel. To not even say goodbye. To try and just erase me. You are right - love isn't just how someone feels it's also how they act. I know I didn't always act out of love and I carry a lot of shame and guilt and blame for him leaving )even though logically I know it wasnt all my fault) but I dont think I could ever treat a longterm partner the way he is treating me now. There's a lack of empathy and accountability in his actions. Discarding a human you claim to love in such a way.
I'm deeply sorry you're going through this, Cassandra. Your partner's actions are so cruel and lacking in empathy. It makes sense that you're feeling shame and guilt. Your ability to recognize the unhealthy aspects of his behavior shows your own growth and self-awareness. I know how hard it must be to try to focus on healing yourself. You deserve someone who communicates openly and treats you with respect.
I feel very similarly. My partner ghosted me also about 3 weeks ago and after 3 years of being together/only a few days before we were supposed to close on our new home. He said he was going somewhere for the night and would talk to me in the morning but instead he drove cross country to his parents and blocked me as soon as he left, just disappearing. after 1 1/2 weeks I tried to reach out via email to apologize for my part in our fights that led up to the breakup and he didn't respond. Just blocked me on there too. I know he's back on dating apps and talking to another woman already (I saw on our phone records which are still shared) a part of me knows he loves me and his avoidant self is doing all this to distract himself from his feelings and avoid any confrontation and pain but it's also so cruel. To not even say goodbye. To try and just erase me. You are right - love isn't just how someone feels it's also how they act. I know I didn't always act out of love and I carry a lot of shame and guilt and blame for him leaving )even though logically I know it wasnt all my fault) but I dont think I could ever treat a longterm partner the way he is treating me now. There's a lack of empathy and accountability in his actions. Discarding a human you claim to love in such a way.
I'm deeply sorry you're going through this, Cassandra. Your partner's actions are so cruel and lacking in empathy. It makes sense that you're feeling shame and guilt. Your ability to recognize the unhealthy aspects of his behavior shows your own growth and self-awareness. I know how hard it must be to try to focus on healing yourself. You deserve someone who communicates openly and treats you with respect.