What If You Don't Want to Forget?

Stop Chasing Indifference

Somewhere along the way, indifference became the finish line.

The place you’re supposed to arrive at if you’ve done the healing right. The ultimate proof that you’re over it, that you’ve moved on, that you’re finally free.

And if you’re not there yet? If their name still lands in your chest with weight? If you still feel the anger, the sadness, the disbelief that this happened?

Then you must not be healing correctly.

At least, that’s what it feels like when everyone around you is celebrating indifference like it’s the only valid form of recovery.

Indifference gets framed as the ultimate goal because people assume it means freedom from pain.

They see detachment as strength. Being unaffected as power. The ability to shrug and say “I don’t even think about them anymore” as evidence that you’ve won.

And look, for some people, that may be true. Some people survive betrayal by shutting down. By numbing the emotional charge. By building walls so high that nothing can reach them anymore.

That’s a valid survival strategy. I’m not here to judge it.

But what if you’re someone who values emotional depth? Who honors your feelings even when they’re uncomfortable? Who has spent your whole life trying to stay connected to what’s true inside you, even when the world told you to be smaller, quieter, less intense?

For you, indifference might not feel like freedom.

It might feel like a betrayal of yourself or just something you’re trying so hard not to feel, that when the feelings come up, all you end up feeling is stuck!